9/28/14 WEWRIWA

Welcome, dear readers and friends to another glorious fall day, toward the end of September. Weekend Writer Warriors are a community of writers who enjoy constructive critique and welcome newcomers.

I continue with my latest release Housebroken. Steve and Sally have had a major setback when the major corporation he worked for many years gave Steve him his walking papers. OUCH! Devastated , Sally sees her dreams of moving to the lovely town of River’s Edge fade away as she comforts her husband. The mood changes in this week’s eight and I do mean 8.as promised.

excerpt in eight:

“Hiro San firing me is an omen like an ill wind that sometimes blows good.” Steve sat up straight, resolution in his face and said,” I’m tired of traveling every week and since 9/11, air travel is complicated.  I’m sure we’ll manage the move to River’s Edge with some help from our new friend, Claudia.

With a sigh of relief, Sally said, “Oh, Steve, now what can I do to make you feel better if just for a little while?”

Steve got that gleam in his eyes as he tugged off her running bra and helped pull down her shorts after she kicked off her sneakers. “Lose the socks, Sally, while I peel off this damn suit ’cause  I sure hope my next job doesn’t require a tie.”

In the sweet afterglow, Steve revealed a secret he’d kept hidden from his wife and himself for a long time. “I have a confession to make, honey and I beg you please listen and don’t hate me.”

for more snippets from talented writers:


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52 thoughts on “9/28/14 WEWRIWA

  1. Oh, well, that’s a hook if I ever read one! I’m curious as to what his secret is.

    One little thing – and ignore me if it’s because you tried to fit in only 8 sentences – in the second sentence, I would eliminate the “and said” and break the sentence into two separate ones. Coming at the end of the phrase reads a little awkward and the long sentence length drags the momentum of the conversation.

    Other than that, great eight. I can’t wait to see what Steve’s secret is!

  2. what? No! You can’t end there! Now I have to wait a whole week to learn the secret. 😦 Sadness.

    Great 8. Reading about a more mature couple is nice. Seeing how secure they are in each other and their relationship. You can easy feel the commitment they have to each other.

  3. Uhoh is this a good secret or a bad secret?? very rarely a good thing when they tell you a secret AFTER! …Don’t worry, Steve sometimes one door closing opens several other doors or atleast a window!!… you always have the best snippets, Charmaine! ❤

  4. :O Uh- oh, he has a confession to make? That can’t be good, can it? I’m glad he’s trying to get over being fired but I sure hope that what he has to say doesn’t get him in too much trouble… graet snippet as always, Charmaine!

  5. Ooh, a secret! That’s built-in suspense. 😀

    You know, I like that he’s going to tell her. He could try to keep it hushed up if he *really* thinks she won’t like it. But maybe it’s something good and he’s just messing with her? Charmaine, you tease 😀 😀

  6. Can’t help it. Married forever, I’m speaking of myself, late bloomer like Sally, I know the trials and wonderment of married life and write about them, for better and sometimes for worse like my book Now What?. At 83, I continue having fun in my life and writing my butt off each day. I do miss show biz and my good voice though. Thanks, my friend. I’m offering a decoder ring to a few choice pals for the key to the secret.

  7. You can’t leave me hanging! What’s the secret!? I loved your dialogue, the conversation flowed naturally with body language being mentioned. I like that the husband is a smart ass LOL–sarcasm is my favorite type of humor.

    Keep smiling,

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