Now it snows? And tomorrow we’re expecting 60 degrees then a plummet of temps for the rest of the week. New York, New York, it’s a wonderful town.
Welcome friends to WEWRIWA for snippets galore and the opp to use constructive critique the writing of fine writers.
This week- a bit more in my WIP- Breaking New Ground-title suggested by Evelyn Jules. A major Construction Company owned by the egotistical James Chandler claims to own part of the property the widow Brown has lived on for fifty years. This week -introducing Cindy Lou, Celia Brown’s granddaughter who lives with her temporarily while her mom-a Marine-is in Afghanistan. The six year old needs help with a first grade project.
excerpt in eight:
“I have to interview the oldest member of the family,” she pointed the flashlight to her Granny, and that’s you, Grans, wow, 80! you sure are way old;” she planted a wet kiss on Celia’s wrinkled cheek almost knocking her on the head with a heavy black flashlight and said, “Don’t ever die, Grans.”
“Okay I won’t if you promise not to bonk me and please tell me why are you holding that big clunker?”
Cindy giggled, “It’s for the interview, like a microphone so here we go, ready or not.”
A smile crept over Celia’s face; what fun spending quality time alone with her granddaughter while her mom’s deployed to Afghanistan like Marine after Marine, war after war, for generations the Brown family had served in one capacity or another.
A beam of light flashed into her faded blue eyes and Celia blinked as a deep voice came from Cindy’s sweet mouth, “Once upon a time you were six years old, just like me so where did you live and go to school?”
Caught up in the moment, Celia answered in a little girl’s voice. “Chicago, Illinois, and as if she’d never left the town and grown up, Celia saw the red brick school with a big sign. “Volta School. V.O.L.T.A. and my mommy bought me pretty dresses, laced up shoes, white ruffled socks and I always wore a big red bow in my hair but she didn’t like polishing my shoes ‘cause she had to wait for them to dry and use a clean cloth to make them shine.”
Cindy looked puzzled, “White shoe polish? Didn’t you have sneakers?
The clock turned forward to real time; Celia had a moment of dizziness as she came back to the present and said,
“Honey, we thought sneakers were bad men who sneaked around stealing things that didn’t belong to them”
for more snippets from talented writers:
Author Charmaine Gordon 
we had lots of snow too, i dont know what the temp yesterday, but it was so cold and windy. yet today it was sunny. I say was, because now its grey outside.
I love that excerpt, it was very interesting indeed!
Hi, lovely Rebecca. Thanks for the nifty comment on my WIP. I don’t know if you’ve been following the story about the feisty aging widow in conflict with the owner of a construction company. Angst combined with humor and a six year old granddaughter you just met. Happy New Year.
I just love the humor of the piece. I’d say Granny’s years of experience and all that she has seen would certainly be a bit much for a six-year-old to comprehend. When I was a youngster I remember asking my folks how it felt to cross the plains in a wagon train – the question didn’t go over well, lol. This is a terrific snippet and definitely makes me want to keep reading.
You would ask such a question, Chelle. I’m surprised they didn’t lock you in the dungeon. . .or maybe they did. I’m happy you enjoyed the snippet. It’s almost real time when I speak with my grandest.
Aw, I love the relationship these two have- so warm and humorous!
I had so much fun writing this story, Christina. Thanks.
Loved the line about the sneakers! Wonderful snippet. I know what you mean about the cold. It’s coming South too later this week. Brrrr!
Bundle up, Patricia and wear your sneakers.
LOL, what a cute and touching Snippet. There is a lot in this eight, it was very emotional. I like the ending, but the really touching part was knowing that generation after generation had served and kind of this new tradition is now the mother. Where is the girls father, is he also serving, or is he not in the picture? Great eight!
The father died in the war. He is Granny’s son mentioned briefly in the book. Thanks for seeing into the snippet.
Times have changed. The six year old will learn a lot from granny.
The story moves on; they learn from each other as I do from my six year old granddaughter.
I love how you show the generation(s) gap between them, and yet they’re obviously very fond of each other. A very enjoyable snippet.
Thanks, Alexis. Reading through everyone’s eights today, I see I’m the only one writing these kind of stories. Hmm. Probably because I’m the Grandma Moses of the gang.
I liked her explanation of a sneaker. Great excerpt!
I’m having a lot of fun with this book. Come to think of it, I always enjoy my world of fiction so different from show business which I loved so much. Thanks, ED.
The best moments are the ones you share with love ones. I enjoyed the sweet, fun exchange between the little girl and her granny. Great snippet!
So true, Lorien. One of my sons lives in Denmark and oh the glorious fun and memories we share across the world and then there’s my youngest grandchild-what a funny delicious kid. Of course I wrote her right into this book.
That dizziness worries, me Charmaine . . . I wonder if the arrogant CEO is going to be blindsided by a six-year old in sudden need of a sitter—and a Marine Mom, too! 😀
Sarah, I’m thrilled that you’ve invested yourself in my story. You’ve made my day.
Good job showing how much things have changed during Grandma’s lifetime. I’ve given my students projects like this one.
I didn’t know you are a teacher. How wonderful. My daughter is also a terrific teacher. She’s the mother of the six year old in my story.
Great scene, very believable and full of warmth.
Thanks, Gemma, for the lovely comment.
Loved this scene. So cute. Words do have a way of changing their meaning, don’t they? lol
They sure do. More to follow next week. Be good, Karen.
A lovely slide from one era to another. Beautifully written!
Ah Gem, your comment is music to my ears. Thanks.
Wonderful and charming! Great 8.
OMG, I’m so gratified by the comments. So far so good with this WIP.
Awww, loved this…and so amusing. (Also loved Chelle’s comment above about asking her family how it was to cross the West in covered wagons LOL. I seem to remember my girls asking me about the dinosaurs they assumed were in MY childhood!) I can see how Cindy Lou’s presence will cause Celia to fight the corporation that wants her land even harder. Minor MINOR nit? When I hear of a little girl named Cindy Lou, I always think of Cindy Lou Who in the Grinch. Maybe that’s just me…and I was right back into the story a second later. Can’t wait for more!
I thought about using Cindy Rae or my grandest’s real name CassidyRae. After a big discussion with my munchkin she decided to play with the cats and walked out of the room. So happy you’re enjoying the story thus far. Stop by for tea? The kettle’s on.
Cindy Lou made me think of the Grinch too. This is a sweet scene.
Finally getting some snow here too, and it looks like the cold is here to stay for a week or so at least. Bad wind chills. *brr*
Kate, thanks to you and Veronica, I’m changing Cindy Lou to CassidyRae, the name of my grandest.
Ha Ha. I loved the line of the granddaughter accidentally knocking her grandma upside the head.
Keep smiling,
Yawatta
You are a rascal. It happens in real life so write it down, I always say. Thanks, Yawatta.
Great snippet between a grandmother and her granddaughter. And it made me remember polising my own shoes….wasn’t much of a fan either 🙂
Hi. Nicolette. Thanks for leaving the comment So many memories when you think back. Mostly good.
Awww, how cute! I especially love the last line about the “sneakers.” Made me giggle in a most unbecoming fashion. 🙂 Thanks for sharing
Amalie, you lovely person you, thanks for stopping by and giggle all you want.
Lovely snippet. We get a lovely sense of Celia’s life ❤
Thanks, Elsa. It’s so close to my life without the conflict. See you Sunday.