With dinner consumed, laughter through every course followed by presents grabbed from under the tree, I watched paper ripped to open packages once carefully taped together. Oohs and aahs with delight because every one was satisfied/thrilled with the gifts they so desired now fulfilled until next year.
Sad. I thought because this was the first year he wasn’t with me to enjoy watching our children have so much fun. Year after year we watched them grow, arguing over gifts sometime, playing most of the time and now there were grand children to fill spaces at the table. But for me, the head of the table would forever be empty.
They left a couple of hours later, retreating to their comfortable homes. I sat alone in the family room. I gazed at the couch he used to occupy, all comfortable, stretched out, a pillow behind his head. The dogs crowding close to him, no room for me. I sat across from him where there was room to do my stretches while we watched a movie, so peaceful.Now it wasn’t peaceful. No. Now it was lonely.
I headed up to the large bedroom with two lovely closets. His clothes remained in his space. Time to take them down. Time to move on. Time to survive and thrive after such a loss.
That was Christmas past. If you know me at all, I did move on. I did survive and thrive.
My best to all of you wishing a joyous Christmas and the happiest, healthy New Year.