A love letter to my lost one

We were the best couple ever, always loving and together since high school. Our motto was Marriage is one long conversation. And it was. We had our children, lost two, the Air Force years were remarkable. I was so proud of you, my handsome pilot. Civilian life proved to be tough but we made it, always talking things over, figuring out life’s problems together. The older boys chose to play guitars just as you did. Lessons, the basement arranged for their instruments and then a new era began. The seventies, the dawning of Aquarius, girls stopped wearing bras, and marijuana spread through the schools. We didn’t know it would also spread into our home. Life changed drastically as you went off to work and I was left at home with two little ones and two teens out of control.

My love, they never changed, our older children. After that , it became us, the small kids, and them. A few years later, your heart required a pacemaker. From then on you listened to your heart and forgot about me. Thirty seven years of happiness and suddenly, I was alone with a houseful of kids. You had a fever that wouldn’t go down. Doctor put you in the hospital for examination. After a few days of visiting, we sat together so sad life had changed for us. You looked at me the old way, so dear and loving, and said, “I love you.” We kissed and said goodbye.

2:30 in the morning the doctor called. Hurry, he said. By the time I arrived , you were gone.

How can I express the loss of my dearest? I can’t and it was a long time ago. So I say, “Happy Birthday wherever you are.”

My question is you were 56 when I lost you and I have aged. Have you or are you the same hale and hearty kind of guy I met in high school and we fell in love.

P.S. The older sons abandoned me after taking all the money you left to give me a comfortable life. All gone and so are they. Bad words to them from you and me.

Our two younger kids are all grown-up. Our son is married to an extraordinary woman, a fabulous artist. He continues with his artistic life of performing. They live in Denmark. Our beautiful girl grew up to be a teacher and the dearest daughter. We have a granddaughter you would love to pieces, she’s so smart and delightful. She’s nine and plays on a basketball team. You should see her guard. Or maybe you do. I wonder.

I had a bad fall and daughter and granddaughter saved my life. It’s been a difficult time, my love.

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6 thoughts on “A love letter to my lost one

  1. Life is about loss as much as it is about living. Having uttered that platitude, let me also say that your letter plucked at my heartstrings. He was lucky to have had you, and vice versa.

  2. Love you, mom!!!! I think of him all the time… and wish I could have a 2-way conversation and get some feedback. He died when I was in my early 20s and just starting to be able to relate to him on a semblance of an adult level. (sigh)

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